I don’t like to admit this, but I have a favorite child.
It’s hard not to. There are just certain moments that I’m able to really feel present with them in. If it’s quiet enough I can hear myself in their voice. I don’t usually notice that. Their laughter sounds like memories I hope I’ll never forget.
When they spill it, break it, destroy it, I’m able to distinguish the difference between an accident and a premeditated crime. Why can’t I do that otherwise? Every stain feels so permanent. I can’t smile through it.
I find myself saying yes when I otherwise get stuck on no. I can read another book. We can pull over and grab ice cream. I splurge, and it feels good to be needed for once, not draining. In fact, I like car rides with you, rainstorms, or “I spy” in traffic. The things that used to feel like inconveniences can suddenly feel like bonding.
When you have multiple children, it’s hard to get time one on one, but we have to. It’s in those moments that you remember all the things your gang of kids made you forget.
It’s when I notice the birthmark on their shoulder and that bedtime shouldn’t be rushed. I find myself singing along and snuggling close. For parents of multiples it’s hard not to feel outnumbered and out of steam, so when you can, fill up. Sneak them out, one by one, and let them be your favorite. You can lose that in the mob. Remember what it’s like to love them individually.
Every single time I do, I discover my favorite child, is always the one I’m with.
To read more pieces from Heather, visit www.imthatwife.com/magazine